2012

Going out with a bang! Here’s 2011. Previous years are locked away for only me to read.

1. What did you do in 2012 that you’d never done before?
   Well, there was that whole getting married thing but we didn’t treat it as a major deal and kind of wish people would stop acting like it was. (I mean, yes, we get it, marriage is a big commitment and all of that stuff but we’ve been together TWELVE years and we lived together for SIX. For all intents and purposes, we were pretty much married. Aside from that, there was the whole exercise regularly thing which I have let fall a bit to the wayside over the holidays (and by holidays, I mean pretty much all of fall/winter but in my defense, the daylight savings time really kills my ability to do my walk after work). I was really pushing myself to be active and get fit this year and I did more than I have ever done in my life and damn, if I wasn’t proud of myself for that. I also got my Concealed Weapons Permit which was something I’ve been meaning to cross off my list and it couldn’t have come at a better time.
2. Did you keep your new years’ resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
   There were a few I inadvertently kept and some that had to fall to the wayside because life changed and plans changed and they weren’t going to fit in with where things were. But overall, they weren’t really resolutions in so much as a list of things I’d like to accomplish, which greatly took the pressure off and let me accomplish a decent amount of them. I plan to take this same approach this year and hopefully will be just as productive, if not more..
3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
   My sister gave birth to a baby girl in June, our first niece on my side. So so cute!
4. Did anyone close to you die?
   After a couple of years of losing some very special people, we thankfully escaped this one unscathed. Here’s to hopefully repeating that for quite some time.
5. What countries did you visit?
   Look, until “countries” become “states or cities in the mainland US”, my answer for this question is going to be the same. Maybe that’s what I’ll do instead but that’s going to have to wait until next year because we didn’t go ANYWHERE this year.
6. What would you like to have in 2013 that you lacked in 2012?
   Less drama, more love from all areas of my life. Better relationships with people I should have been keeping in touch with but distance and time and life just got in the way. Acceptance and the ability to move on from wishing for something we won’t ever get, at least not any time soon.
7. What dates from 2012 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
   April 1st – the day we got “engaged”. April 6th – the day we got married and told everyone. (I told people when it happened, we wouldn’t mess around. Five days y’all! That’s all it took!). June 23rd – Our “wedding” party that we had a blast at. August 1st – the day an illness kicked in that would eventually lead to us finding out Steve has Crohn’s.
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
   Talking Steve into marrying me! HAHA! Standing up for us when it really needed to be done (and putting aside the fear I have of confrontation). Oh, and doing better on my shooting and written test for my CWP than my husband! 😉
9. What was your biggest failure?
   Not being able to let shit go and just letting it fester. And to be frankly honest, drowining so many of those feelings in alcohol under the guise of “social” drinking. This will be a detox year for me!
10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
    This has been a fairly illness and injury free year for me (*knock on wood*) which I’m thankful for because I don’t think we could handle both of us having issues at the same time. I do struggle with some foot issues with all of my walking but I think I’ve figured out what they are and am on the road to resolving them, which makes me happy because there’s nothing I have found I enjoy more than walking and it was making me seriously depressed that I couldn’t do it without pain.
11. What was the best thing you bought?
    Our new entertainment center and 55” TV. It finally makes me happy with how the living room is coming together and feels like a home. I feel more like a grown up than I ever did, even when sitting in front of it and playing video games with Steve.
12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
    Look, this answer is just going to be the same every year because I cannot begin to explain how awesome my husband is to me and how he brings so much value and joy and love to my life. Also, a big shout out to my parents who didn’t kill me for running off and getting married – they were upset but they didn’t turn their backs on us and accepted that we did it the way we wanted to unlike some others that we know. BECAUSE THAT’S WHAT YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO DO AS PARENTS!!!
13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
    2012 has been a very sad year on our part as we’ve watched people who we though we knew and loved make decisions that are in contrast to what we expected from them. And unfortunately, those decisions have had a direct effect on our relationships with them and it’s heartbreaking. But while we’ve struggled with it, I think we’ve both reached a place where we are aware of what we want and who we are and we will not compromise that to make someone else happy (and to only have them turn around and do the same thing to us the next time an issue comes up). And we know what we need to move on and that’s peace and acceptance of how the situation is and to stop fighting over how it should be. Also, people who don’t have vaginas and reproductive systems trying to make decisions and tell me what I can and can’t do with mine. In other words, the entire political system and those that participated for all the wrong reasons because, no. That’s just not how it’s supposed to work.
14. Where did most of your money go?
    BILLS. BILLS. BILLS. And the mortgage. And Christmas was a tad bit overboard this year. But at least I’m aware of that and plan to dial that shit back next year. Also, food. Because as it turns out, eating well and healthy is expensive as shit. But I’d rather invest my money in that and make sacrifices in other places.
15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
    I’d say I got excited about being married and, I did, but since it happened so quickly and I didn’t even believe it was real until we signed the papers, the excitement only got a chance to bubble under the surface and not explode like it normally would. It just kind of leaked out through the year so I guess it still counts. (That still doesn’t make it any more awesome but you get the point).
16. What song will always remind you of 2012?
    Anything from Pink’s new album since that shit was on repeat for like four months straight. Also, “Call Me Maybe” because like it isn’t for y’all? Also, “Starships” because whatever, it’s catchy enough to dance to in my car. And “Somebody that I Used to Know” because we all screamed it when we were alone. You know you did. (So basically anything that was popular on the radio which is ironic considering I pretty much don’t listen to radio anymore)
17. Compared to this time last year, are you:

• a) happier or sadder? Generally happier but I am blessed to pretty much always be able to say I am happy.
• b) thinner or fatter?  THINNER! YAY!
• c) richer or poorer? Eh, depends on your definition of the two. In some ways, I am infinitely richer. In others, I am poorer than I have ever been.

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
    Take more pictures. In the past, my photography has corresponded with things we’ve done and since we didn’t do much or go anywhere this year, there is much photographic evidence. But I took a photography class earlier and plan to take two more so I’d really like to make more of an effort to photography our daily lives and make trips out to document this beautiful area I live in. Also, just generally to get out of the house more. Also, maintain this blog. I started off 2011 with a lot of drive and put a lot into it but then it kind of fizzled. Sometimes I just feel like my life isn’t all that interesting enough to write about and then I regret it when I open the site and realize I’ve missed writing about four months of my life.
19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
    Hoped for people to act the way I expected them to or the way a normal person would expect another person to act. Because that never played out and it really hurt. Also, I wish I would’ve been less negative and more positive in light of things. And I could’ve been a better friend, daughter, sister, granddaughter, all around person – I just get so wrapped up in the daily life that it’s hard to step out of that and make time for others.
20. How did you spend Christmas? 
    No traveling for yet another which I’m starting to enjoy. We had friends over on Christmas Eve and ate dinner than watched movies and hung out. Christmas Day we woke up and exchanged presents then went to my parents to do the same and have dinner. Very quiet and low key and man oh man did I love it.
21. Who did you spend the most time on the phone with?
    This question is pretty much the same every year – my mom and my sister-in-law because they’re the ones I talk to on the phone and I spend quite a bit of time talking to them both.
22. What was your favorite TV program?
    This was the year of catching up on things we’ve been missing and falling in love with them or falling back in love with them. Breaking Bad. Game of Thrones. Boardwalk Empire. There were also the usual favorites: Sons of Anarchy.  The Walking Dead. Modern Family. The Big Bang Theory. Always Sunny in Philadelphia.  And a new favorite: Nashville.
23. What was your favorite video game? (I substituted a question I wasn’t too keen on with one I’d rather answer.)
    First three quarters of the year: Skyrim. Last quarter: Borderlands 2. Oh man, I love those games. It was a great year for video games.
24. What was the best book you read?
    I didn’t do nearly as much reading as I wanted. Both Borderlands and Skyrim are very intense and time consuming games so they kind of took over my life. But of the books I got in early in the year, these are my favorites: Gone Girl by Gillian Flynn. A Grown Up Kind of Pretty by Joshilyn Jackson. The Fault in Our Stars by John Green. And Let’s Pretend this Never Happened by Jenny Lawson.
25. What was your greatest musical discovery or rediscovery?
    Not really a discovery because I’ve always known this but Pink’s new album, The Truth About Love is so amazing. It carried me through all of my four mile walks in the Fall and it never gets old. Also, my Spotify Premium subscription which was hands down like a miracle from the heavens and pretty much killed my Pandora addiction. You mean I can search for and find almost ANY song I want and listen to that song RIGHT NOW? And I can make playlists that pretty much correspond with all of my mix CDs from college and not have to wait to burn them? And I can subscribe to playlists of all the boy bands from the 90s and fast forward through the songs that nobody liked? Yes … yes please!!!
26. What did you want and get?
    An iPad!! (woot woot!). A Coach bag that took me months to pull the trigger on. My CWP. Married!
27. What did you want and not get?
    Apologies. Forgiveness. To be heard and understood.
28. What were your favorite films of this year?
    Looper. The Cabin in the Woods. Magic Mike (for the experience more than the film). Ted. The Hunger Games. The Avengers. The Dark Knight Rises.
29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
    I turned 31 so it wasn’t a milestone day. Plus, we had just done the whole getting married thing like two weeks before in which Steve bought me a sparkly wedding band so I had all I needed. But I did take the day off work and we went to dinner with my parents at a local restaurant to celebrate. It was a nice low key day and sometimes you just need to usher in another year that way.
30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
    If things could be the way they used to be but I sadly don’t think we’ll ever get back to that place. It also would have been nice had we not had to discover Steve had this illness but in a way, I’m kind of glad we did so we can maintain it better than we were when we didn’t know.
31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2012?
    I’m in my thirties and pretty comfortable with myself so my fashion concepts don’t really change from year to year. I wear what fits and flatters and isn’t uncomfortable. I did break out a bit and wear some dresses this summer but only because I found ones that I was comfortable enough with their fit.
32. What kept you sane?
    Steve. My friends and family. Booze. And shooting things in Borderlands (or stabbing people with swords in Skyrim).
33. Whom did you miss?
    I’ve lost a lot of people who were very special to me over the years and I always miss them, especially around this time of year. But there are people still here who are mere shadows of their former selves or the people I thought they were (and this is after YEARS of knowing them) and I miss those people because the new ones in their place are not very likeable at all.
34. Who was the best new person you met?
    I’ve been blessed to meet so many wonderful new people this year – I don’t think I could narrow it down.
35. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2012:
    I learn so many lessons every year.

• The extra twenty minutes it takes to style a really good haircut it worth it’s wait in gold. So is putting on enough makeup to make yourself not look like a zombie. With apocalypse nigh, you wouldn’t want to be mistaken for the undead just because you didn’t feel like dressing up to go to Target.
• You cannot expect every situation to work itself out the way you want it to. Bitching about it constantly is only going to make you feel worse about it. Bitch once then move on. There are plenty other things to complain about it.
• Also, it’s probably better to try and find something positive. All of the negativity just puts you in a shitty mood. Yes, we need to rant about stuff but sometimes, no one wants to hear that and it’s more tiring to talk about it than it is to flip the script.
• The best way to bond with your significant other is to find one thing the both of you enjoy and do that until you don’t enjoy it anymore. Then realize you’re more addicted to it than him and force him to continue doing it until you’re over it (I’m talking about Borderlands).
• Addiction is a genetic disease that can hit you faster than you are prepared for it. The key is to recognize that and stop that shit before it starts to bend you, let alone break you.
• Stop caring so much and you’ll be less affected by those who don’t care about you.

35. Do you have any lost feelings of others.
    Expectations, same as last year.
36. Quote a song that sums up your year:
    
    

1,2,3,4,5 years go by
I don’t really know why I don’t really know why
7,8,9,11 years go by
I don’t really know why I don’t really know why
I still feel the same way I did when I was 17
I still look over my shoulder waitin for the world to change

 

1,2,3,4,5 years from now
I hope I’m still getting down
I hope I’m still around
But 6,7,8,10 beers ago
I had a revelation all is well right now
It’s all good right now