You know what the problem is with having too many hobbies?
There’s not enough time in the day to accomplish them all.
This has been my life for the past few months and can explain why I’ve ducked out of here a bit. Actually, most of the fault can be blamed on the routine I’ve put myself into since I started my whole fitness and healthier living regime back in January. There is a strict set of time I follow that means I get home from work, work out for about an hour, shower and do my nightly routine, make and eat dinner and by that point my brain is so dead that all it wants to do is sit on the couch and read stupid things on the Internet or go to sleep. At times like those, the idea of composing a blog post happens to fly right out the window.
However, I had to pop in to document one of the biggest moments that have happened to me in awhile before I forgot all of the details and then look back years from now and become sad because I didn’t even bother to write it down. See, there are unwritten rules in the blogging world, at least the world I come from (read: old school before most of y’all knew what blogging was). And the number one rule is that ‘Thou shalt not skip over blogging about some of the biggest events of thou’s life because then thou will want to look back and remember and will have nothing’.
And Facebook doesn’t count because have you seen the new Timeline? I can’t find shit on there that happened a week ago!
Anywho, this happened …
Sometimes my brain has a hard time wrapping itself around the idea that we’ve been together almost half of my life. There are moments where it feels like just yesterday that we had our first date, sitting in the mall parking lot in your Bronco drinking beer and just talking while waiting to go in to see a movie. But most of the time, I feel the gravity of those twelve years, the comfort in knowing who you are and who I am and who we are together as one. It is a wonderful feeling, that comfort, because there is a sense of peace and safety in that for me. You have such a way of making me feel safe and secure in myself, in us, in my place in the world. There is nothing greater to me than knowing that I will come home to you every evening and wake up to you every morning. In knowing that the moments of silence are ok and just as special as the loud and boisterous ones. Some of the greatest moments of my life have been spent in your presence alone, enjoying a long road trip or navigating you through the rocky trails of the Poconos or enjoying a day long concert or drag racing where we are over excited, overwhelmed and just generally hyped up over how much fun we are having.
Happy New Year Y’all!
Hope everyone was able to celebrate it in a fun and safe way. Some people may think it’s dumb to celebrate a kind of trivial holiday like New Year’s but I kind of like it. Aside from it giving us a chance to get together with people we love and enjoy, it’s kind of nice to to feel like there’s a fresh start to things. Plus, I really do love the well wishes and hugs and kisses at midnight!
Happy New Years Eve! Hope everyone has a fun and safe night of celebrating the old and bringing in the new! I figured I’d celebrate by doing my annual year end survey (third year in a row! though the others are hidden from public eye) and reflecting on the past year. Sending wishes to you all that the new year brings all the happiness and joy you deserve. Thank you for reading and can’t wait to see what 2012 brings.
A few weeks ago, I get an email at work announcing the hospital’s annual blood drive. As my finger is hovering over the delete button, I stop myself.
Three years ago, on December 4, 2008, I was diagnosed with two clots in my lower left leg (deep vein thrombosis). The course of treatment to keep these clots from dislodging and moving into my lungs (pulmonary embolism) was to start me immediately on blood thinners. This meant that for two weeks, I had to get injections of Lovenox in my stomach while my PT/INR levels balanced out – this basically meant my blood had to be at a stable level of just thin enough not to clot and to help break up the existing clots but not too thin where I would bleed out from a tiny cut. Once my levels were stable, I was able to transition to an oral blood thinner but I still had to go in almost every day for blood draws so they could watch the levels. Since there were so many factors that could change them (diet, medications – including the pain meds I was taking – caffeine, etc.), they had to monitor where they were at so they could adjust my dosage accordingly.
It was fairly complicated but I eventually balanced out and they weaned me off of getting the blood drawn every day. I got on a steady dose of blood thinner and within six months, the clots had broken up and I was completely off the medicine and back to normal, for the most part (there’s a few residual side effects but nothing I can’t live with).
Regardless, before that happened, I was TERRIFIED of needles. I don’t know where the phobia came from but for as long as I can remember, it was like that. It wasn’t the pain, or lack thereof, that bothered. It was the act of puncturing the skin that squicked me out. If I knew I had to get blood drawn or a shot, my anxiety would be through the roof – pale, short of breath, sweaty, ready to faint. It just wasn’t something that I could conquer.