Sometimes my brain has a hard time wrapping itself around the idea that we’ve been together almost half of my life. There are moments where it feels like just yesterday that we had our first date, sitting in the mall parking lot in your Bronco drinking beer and just talking while waiting to go in to see a movie. But most of the time, I feel the gravity of those twelve years, the comfort in knowing who you are and who I am and who we are together as one. It is a wonderful feeling, that comfort, because there is a sense of peace and safety in that for me. You have such a way of making me feel safe and secure in myself, in us, in my place in the world. There is nothing greater to me than knowing that I will come home to you every evening and wake up to you every morning. In knowing that the moments of silence are ok and just as special as the loud and boisterous ones. Some of the greatest moments of my life have been spent in your presence alone, enjoying a long road trip or navigating you through the rocky trails of the Poconos or enjoying a day long concert or drag racing where we are over excited, overwhelmed and just generally hyped up over how much fun we are having.
There is always so much to say that goes unsaid but that is ok because I know that things don’t need to be spoken to be felt. I feel your love every day of my life. I feel it when you kiss me goodbye before you leave and kiss me hello when you get home. I feel it when you remind me that I need to get out of bed and when you force me to take medicine when I’m sick. I feel it when you hug me because I’m hurt (which happens more often that it should) and when you shake your head and laugh at me during my blonde moments. I feel it when you are protective of me and when you are gentle with me and when you are firm with me.
I am infinitely grateful to you for showing me so many things that I never would have had any interest in trying or doing without you in my life. There are so many awesome experiences we’ve had, experiences that would’ve never even entered my mind before we were together. Car shows, drag racing, monster trucks, four wheeling, video games, awesomely amazingly bad B-movies (which I pay back with my awesomely bad chick flicks), geocaching, long road trips to no where. Every single one of these things has not only turned out to be ridiculously fun but gives me such an awesome feeling knowing that we can share them and enjoy them together.
We all have our quirks and I know I can be a pain in the ass, as we all can be. And I’m grateful everyday that you put up with that, that you stay and understand that the good moments always outweigh the bad and are infinitely worth sticking around for.
There is so much that I love and enjoy about you. I love the way you are with the dogs and how much love you have to give them. I love what a dedicated and honest worker you are – I am constantly amazed by your integrity, particularly when it comes to work you don’t particularly care for. Your intellect amazes me and I love how funny you are. Your quick wit is always there for a perfectly timed joke and this gives me so many days and years filled with laughs. You are ridiculously good at whatever you set your mind to and I am always in awe of how you are able to take projects and produce them almost exactly how you envision them in your head (since this rarely happens for me). I love that you make the effort to be half of our relationship, whether it’s to take care of parts of the house when needed or to feed the dogs. I always feel like I can count on you if there’s something I need. I never need to feel like you’ll let me down because I know you will try your hardest to do whatever it is that needs to be done.
Twelve years is a long time. We were barely in our 20s and now we are entering our 30s together. It is bittersweet – part of me is sad because there are times it feels like life is rushing by so quickly. But part of me is happy because I got to spend such an amazing time with you and there is only more to come. I am immensely proud of who you have become over the years – a hardworking, honest, proud, successful man with a ridiculous amount of integrity and strength, strength that I can lean on when I need it and count on to be there in times when I have none left.
Thank you for that. Thank you for being there to pick me up, to hold me when I needed support, to encourage me when I needed to be encouraged, to cheer for me when I needed a cheerleader. Thank you for believing in me, for calling me on my bullshit, for holding me, for teaching me and for never giving up on me. Thank you for coming into my life and thank you for staying.
I love you so much more than I can ever put into words. I am so very happy to have you in my life and ridiculously proud to call you my boyfriend, my love, my copilot and my Valentine.